True story: I was riding down the Keystone to my bike building job when I came up to a guy shuffling along while hunkered over a stroller and talking on his cell phone. I of course called out, "Passing on your left" of which I knew he'd be pretty oblivious. What I didn't know is that there was a very anxious dog behind a fence along the trail that couldn't contain her excitement any longer when I passed between her and the stroller pushing reluctant father. Lots of barking ensued and I think the guy nearly crapped himself. I hear from him after I'm leaving the interesting scene, "Go ride on the road."
I continue riding on trying to process what I just heard. "Ride on the road?" On the road I usually hear the opposite, "Get on the sidewalk," so I was in deep turmoil as to where my place in the world should be. Guess I need to invent a flying bike.
Ok, that actually wasn't a true story. Or was it? With the other guys writing great stuff I decided to join the party partly. I read the reply that Fred made on an old post about joining their pact to write once a week. His reply was a couple days after I made the post, but I didn't see if for a month for some reason. I wonder if I should tell him that I did see that reply? What do you think, Brady?
I do enjoy their stories though. You never know if they are telling you their version of real life experiences or just making something up completely. I guess that's what makes a good writer.
So anywho, SHOMER SHABBOS!!! I'm proposing an easy 3 hour ride from Aksarben in the morning (7am or 8am start, tbd) this Saturday. It's gonna be a warm and possibly windy/rainy one, so the earlier in the day the better.. But it will be fun. And when I say "easy ride" I mean that there might be some punchiness, but don't expect me and Randell to follow all of them. That's right, I said Randell. As in Jon Effing Randell of cat 1 racing lore. He has recently come out of retirement from newborn wrangling and brewing/beer drinking. Well, he's still doing both in abundance, but adding easy riding to the unending list of parental responsibilities. And like me, he's a little soft of the mid-section and formerly strong of the legs. But we're working on it.
I imagine we'll head South and maybe do the old Wednesday Night Worlds route, or maybe hit the Glennwood Loop. However, those routes might delve into the 3-4 hour mark. We'll see. 2.5 hrs has been our norm for the past few weeks. Bumping up to 4 might be a tad much.
UPDATE!! We will be leaving Jones Bros Cupcakes at 7:30am. Arrive early if you want a cuppa somefin.
6 comments:
True story: everything I write is a true story. I cannot write outside of my own experience. I've tried, but I just cannot do it. Everything I write about, I have experienced. I might embellish the story here or there. I may also fib here or there. Tell white lies from time to time. Once or twice, I may have down right lied to you. Okay, so it's a complete fabrication. Who cares? Geez! The point is that it gets the job done (deadline) and it's posted on the internet each Friday.
I believe everything I read on the internet. That's what makes me a distinguished person. And because I believe everything I read is true -- including my fabrications -- it logically follows that so long as I read my own posts, I validate their, um, validity. Therefore, everything I write is a true story.
Let me provide another example. While reading your Shomer Shabbos post, I completely believed your "Go Ride on the Road" story. Therefore, since I believe everything I read on the internet, it's the truth. I'm telling you: that story happened, brother. Here's what's also true: later, when you claimed it as a false experience, you made yourself a liar. Not because you allegedly may/may not have made up the story, but it was because I had already validated it as the Truth a moment before you claimed it was false. You're a liar, Munson.
Anyway, you don't need to tell Fred about reading the 'pact' reply. Even though I told you last Saturday that Fred doesn't know shit, he's actually omniscient and already knows you read it.
And because Fred's omniscient, he already knew/knows that I would be sending my regrets about this Saturday morning. I would if I could, but I'm already committed to swimming in the corporate swim challenge in the Century Link Center, from 9-11 AM.
Fred's omniscient because I just read the comment above, posted one minute ago
As Fred already knows, I wish you luck on your Saturday splashfest. Just make sure to swim fast enough to avoid raisin-wrinkly digits. Cause that's just gross.
you boys figure out a departure time yet?
Update is at the bottom.
This is the first I've seen of all of this. The great thing about omniscience is not being aware of it. I know everything except for the fact that I know everything. Of course, only in the biblical sense. It was this "oblivious omniscience" that obviously led me straight to this morning's ride without having a clue that it was going on. In contract or compliment to Brady, everything I write is fabrication because I believe nothing. Unless I haven't read it yet. For instance, when I was reading about the guy with the stroller, I was thinking "This is such bullshit." Until you said you made it up. Yeah, the corporate swimming challenge. Whatever.
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