Hey gang how's they going? Absolutely jiggly, I hope! Well it's been a long time since my last post. I know, but I've been busy. Let me tell you about it ...
I used to be a bike racer. They called me "The Munsonator." Actually, they just called me "Munson," then I'd say "ator" under my breath. That's my favourite joke. I always tell it with a British acceyent.
I member this one race back then, it was called the "Shiver Me Timbers" and boy howdy was that one a doozy.
So then there were all these things that happened and details, etc. and Jon Randell won!
Do you want to know how good Jon Randell was? Well, I'll tell you anyway. Very. That's right, I said it. Randell was "Very" good. On the bike. Need I say more? No? Well guess hwat? That's right, I spelt 'what' wrong. that's because I want you to pronounce it that way (with the 'h' first).
So - guess hwat? I'm going to say more even though I needn't.
I member this one time cube was riding with Jon and I. Yeah - I know it should read "Jon and me" but I just think it sounds fancier the incorrect way.
So cube comes up and says, "Uh, you guys. You want to slow down or something. My breath hurts from all your crazy fast riding shenanigans. So I'm all sincere and crap and I tell cube what he can do with his request. I look right at him (I slow down enough to do this) and I goes, "Oh dude. Sorry man. Jon. Let's slow down for the cubester."
Then Jon's all "screw that guy, h'huh!" Well that makes cube laugh so you know what he does? He attacks! That's right. He couldn't even keep up with us. So then Jon quickly dispatched the cubester to his eternal home at Cat 4 Avenue. It was horkelley! I mean totally horkelley!
Ah but alas, those good times are over now and do you want to know why? No? Well I'll tell you why (with a capitol 'Y').
Fact one. My wrist hurts. I'm not saying what it's from, but let's just call it a injury and leave it there.
Secondishesly: I am saving up to pay for stuff I already bought. Your mom doesn't grow on trees, you know! That's my second favorite joke. I always tell it with a Irish acceyent.
In the third corner: I'm a plaid flannel camping campfire coffee making bike rider now. I know what your thinking. Your thinking "It's you're, ya dumb butternut."
Your also thinking "Camping sucks."
In the words of the great Samuel Jackman, allow me to retort - "You suck."
Hey, this has been nice. We'll have to do it again some time. Not.
P.S. Munson. Please don't revoke my writing privilege to this blog. If you had any idea how much fun the last 10 minutes of writing mindless crap was for me ... Also - was that so hard? Let's go. Start